Character sketch Day 16(541 words)

Day Sixteen: Let it slip away.

Focus Word - Disappointment

Song Prompt - LittleLion Man by: Mumford & Sons

Weep for yourself, myman,
You'll never be what is in your heart Weep, little lion man,
You're not as brave as you were at the start
Rate yourself and rake yourself
Take all the courage you have left
Wasted on fixing all the problems that you made in your own head

But it was not your fault but mine
And it was your heart on the line
I really f---d it up this time Didn't I, my dear?
Didn't I, my dear?

Tremble for yourself, my man,
You know that you have seen this all before
Tremble, little lion man,
You'll never settle any of your scores
Your grace is wasted in your face,
Your boldness stands alone among the wreck
Now learn from your mother or else spend your days biting your own neck

But it was not your fault but mine
And it was your heart on the line
I really f----d it up this time
Didn't I, my dear?

But it was not your fault but mine
And it was your heart on the line
I really f----d it up this time
Didn't I, my dear? Didn't I, my dear?

"Trisha!!! Come I will show you the heaven. We can have a picnic. I am sure you will love it. It is just like your dream place....You know you used to tell me about.", Ishaan speaks.

"Nature's beauty without any commercialization, you mean. Only birds to hear my call and water to answer it." I reply dreamingly not hoping for any such place. "

" Absolutely. It is like God's castle on earth. You will absolutely love it. The place reminded me of you when I first saw it. Even today I go there to forget.Come." He insists."
I know I should refuse him. We are spending more and more time together. I am afraid that we will forget our friendship and move again to the next level. And this time it will be more difficult. He is carrying in himself the baggage of his first wife's death. I am encumbered with betrayal. I do not know how can I protect myself. It is like I am being weaved into the web of love and I do not have any weapon against it. Still I am unable to say no to him and i agree,sentencing myself again to emotional tumult.

"OK Ishaan. We will go."

I am rewarded by his beautiful grin.

"Trish you need to wear some flats, so that you Di not fall. And change into something comfortable. It will be a long hike. "

As predicted by Ishaan it was two km of uphill walk. But it was amazing. It was like walking in the canopy of trees. We have carried a backpack filled with food and water. The winding may lost its difficulty amidst our conversation. It felt as I was conversing after so long. Suddenly, I skipped and backpack fell from my hand.

We are so far away from civilizationand I lost our food. I am worried. Ishaan cones to me running. He is shouting "Trish !Trish!"

He raise his hand and I flinch away from his touch. He looks at his raised hand and I realize he was trying to embrace me, not hit me. He murmurs,"Its alright Trish. I am not angry. Just calm. You are not hurt anywhere are you? I should have noticed the loose stone there. I am sorry Trish. I just did not realize. I should have been more careful.I am never going to hit you."

His gentleness is too much for me."You do not need to be sorry. Its my fault. I am not yet over him you know. Sometimes I still have nightmares. " I start sobbing with the strain of everything.

Ishaan takes me in his arms and let me cry it all out. "Trish he was a bastard. Don't let him ruin your life. Give your life a chance."

"Ishaan I do not want to be a disappointment."

"You will never be. You are treasure. If someone did not care to cherish , then it's that idiot's fault. Just let it go. "

I continue sobbing till I have let all my frustration flow in tears. "You must be thinking I am so messed up. "

"No , I am thinking that we have still some trail left to reach our destination. Come let us go."

Character Sketch -Day 14 (618 words)

Day Fourteen: Try to understand
Focus word :- Intention

You know sometimes, baby, I'm so carefree with a joy that's hard to hide.
And then sometimes it seems again that all I have is worry,
and then you're bound to see my other side.

But I'm just a soul whose intentions are good;
oh Lord, please don't let me be misunderstood.

If I seem edgy, I want you to know, I never meant to take it out on you.
Life has its problems, and I get more than my share;
but that's one thing I never mean to do 'cause I love you.

Oh baby, I'm just human.
Don't you know I have faults like anyone? Sometimes I find myself alone regretting some little foolish thing; some simple thing that I've done.

But I'm just a soul whose intentions are good;
oh Lord, please don't let me be misunderstood.

Don't let me be misunderstood.
I try so hard, so don't let me be misunderstood.

I am leaving my hotel. We have successfully created a press kit. My back hurts from sitting so long in a chair. I just want to walk round and round till the blood rushes to my feet. It was difficult job but finally we have settled a layout for a press release as per Mr Wilson's satisfaction. All in all, a good day of work.

For sometime, I was actually able to forget reappearing of Ishaan in my life. But now as I am getting out of the office and see his jeep parked outside, all the morning emotions resurface.

I do not want to sit in the jeep but neither I want to create a scene. And probably self sufficient people also need help in a new countries. I realize that the best course for me and my heart will be to maintain a polite friendship with him. I am a mature woman. I can have handle a simple friendship with one of my exes. I just need to avoid the emotional entanglements. Resolving to behave like a woman of world, I enter his car.

"I guess I have passed your internal debate test, now that you are sitting here. Come on Trish, I told you I will pick you up in the evening. You could have done your delebrations many times now. But no, you had to make me wait in this freezing temperature like a fool." Ishaan lashes at me. I am bewildered. I just made him wait for a few moment. I do not deserve this idiotic shouting.

"Ishaan it was just a few minutes. and you actually cannot blame me for being reluctant. My distrust is a gift from you. I do not blame you but you of all the people should be able to understand."

"Trish...." he tries to speak but my fury has been unleashed. I had have enough of overbearing males.

"You Ishaan, you were the one who left in the dark of the night without letting me say even a good bye. You knew I just had a week more in Paris but instead of making future plans you relented on your plimited. Not only that you took a coward's way out. And now you waltz again in my life trying to help me and you expect me to believe you blindly ?  I have a news for you Mr. Ishaan Verma. I do not care to be a fool again. I will decide the extent of our relationship and I will take as much time I need." I stop my tirade noticing the emotions on his face.He looks as if he is in pain.

"I am sorry Trisha. My intentions were not to be overbearing brute. But I guess I deserve all the blames." Ishaan speaks with a self depreciating laugh." I am really, really sorry. For now and for past as well. I do not think I can justify to you in anyway what I did. But please do not misunderstand me. I would not be able to bear if you will also hate me. I somehow believe that you woyld forgive me, somehow understand me. But I was helpless Trisha. I will never hurt you. I am not trying to make amends for the past. I also don't expect you to swoon after you. I am just offering to help you."

"I understand Ishaan. I accept, rather need your help. But seeing you talking like that resurrected the old ghosts."

"Come Trisha.Blame my boorish behavior on this freezing weather. And tell me whats is first in your shopping list?"

I smile,"Mr. Ishaan you are truly in my clutches.I believe I will make you loot the whole of Slaughter Creek."

Character setch-Day 13(511 words)

Day Thirteen: All time is relative.

Focus Word - Time

Song Prompt - Called Out In The Dark by: Snow Patrol


It's like we just can't help ourselves
'Cause we don't know how to back down
We were called out to the streets
We were called in to the towns

And how the heavens, they opened up
Like arms of dazzling gold
With our rain washed histories
Well they do not need to be told

Show me now, show me the arms aloft
Every eye trained on a different star
This magic
This drunken semaphore
And I

We are listening
And we're not blind
This is your life
This is your time

We are listening
And we're not blind
This is your life
This is your time

I was called out in the dark
By a choir of beautiful cheats
And as the kids took back the parks
You and I were left with the streets

Show me now, show me the arms aloft
Every eye trained on a different star
This magic
This drunken semaphore
And I

We are listening
And we're not blind
This is your life
This is your time

[repeats 5x]

Dear Apu,

Hello Apu. I am writing from my car. I know you will kill me if I somehow did not furnish you with the details of my morning meeting with Ishaan. I did meet him. And I guess I came out unscathed, may be with few scratches. Will you understand if I say it was painful and wonderful at the same time? Ishaan has changed a lot. He may still look like God- same chiseled face, those expressive eyes and drool-worthy physique. But still it is like time has hardened his beauty. He has lost his boyish innocence and acquired a kind of cynical attitude tainted by world.

Did you know he is a widower? He married somebody and she, she committed suicide. Shocking, right? I am still not out of it. He must have respected her a lot. He looked devastated- somehow tainted by the sorrow of it. And he is not into business. He is working in some steel plant which is at two hours distance from here.

I used to belief he will live a model life. I mean I left him for it only right. But everything in his life has so changed. Now I realize, every eye is trained on a different star. What we dream, what others expect out of us and what fate gifts us- all the things are so different.  He is now a stranger to me. But still time brought us together after four years. Those four years have not killed the easy camaraderie between us. He was the only one (apart from you) who could understand and support me without any questions. He believed that I did right.

He stays near by the hotel only. He wanted to drop me to the hotel but Mr. Wilson had already sent a car. So, I refused him. He said he will pick me in the evening and get me acquainted to the Slaughter Creek. I was reluctant but he said it is just his duty to help a fellow Indian. After all, he had been living here for past one year. And I could not say no to him.

These are all the basics of my meeting. I am about to reach the office. Do not start shouting. I will call you in the evening with full detailed report. But Apu, I am afraid- very afraid. I am afraid that I will be sucked in the vortex of past again. I am afraid 'Cause we don't know how to back down. I am afraid our ‘friendship’ will again shift to the plane of romance. I am afraid that my heart will be called out from the dark into his presence. And I do not think, I am strong enough to take an assault now on my heart again. I know you will tell me that I am overanalyzing a simple situation but I can’t help myself-especially with the dreams I have hidden in the recess of my heart.

Have to leave now.

Love

Trisha

P.S. – I will call you in the evening.

Character Sketch- Day 12 (546 words)

Day Twelve: A virtual truth
Focus Word - Sanity

Song Prompt - Virtual Insanity by: Jamiroquai

Oh yeah, what we're living in (let me tell ya)
It's a wonder man can eat at all
When things are big that should be small
Who can tell what magic spells we'll be doing for us
And I'm giving all my love to this world
Only to be told
I can't see
I can't breathe
No more will we be
And nothing's going to change the way we live
Cos' we can always take but never give
And now that things are changing for the worse,
See, its a crazy world we're living in
And I just can't see that half of us immersed in sin
Is all we have to give these -

Futures made of virtual insanity now
Always seem to, be govern'd by this love we have
For useless, twisting, our new technology
Oh, now there is no sound - for we all live underground

And I'm thinking what a mess we're in
Hard to know where to begin
If I could slip the sickly ties that earthly man has made
And now every mother, can choose the colour
Of her child
That's not nature's way
Well that's what they said yesterday
There's nothing left to do but pray
I think it's time I found a new religion
Waoh - it's so insane
To synthesize another strain
There's something in these
Futures that we have to be told.

Futures made of virtual insanity - now
Always seem to, be govern'd by this love we have
For useless, twisting, our new technology
Oh, now there is no sound - for we all live underground

Now there is no sound
If we all live underground
And now it's virtual insanity
Forget your virtual reality
Oh, there's nothing so bad.
I know yeah

Of this virtual insanity, we're livin in.
Has got to change, yeah
Things, will never be the same.
And I can't go on
While we're livin' in oh, oh virtual insanity
Oh, this world, has got to change
Cos I just, I just can't keep going on, it was virtual.
Virtual insanity that we're livin' in, that we're livin' in
That virtual insanity is what it is

Futures made of virtual insanity - now
Always seem to, be govern'd by this love we have
For useless, twisting, our new technology
Oh, now there is no sound - for we all live underground

Living - Virtual Insanity
Living - Virtual Insanity
Living - Virtual Insanity
Living - Virtual Insanity

Virtual Insanity is what we're living in 

“I might have learned to fly. But you tell me Ishaan what are you doing here? You have a business here?” I ask Ishaan. I do not try to hide my curiosity. He has always been like a moon I want to have – so near yet so far. He laughs cynically.

“Trish, time has changed. I am not in my family business. In fact I am not in any business at all. I work here as an operation manager for the steel plant.”

“This place has a steel factory?” I ask idiotically but then I understand what he is saying. He is not into business. But how can it be possible? His business was his dream. My confusion must have shown on my face. He says gently “Trish, dreams changes. Mine has changes with the circumstances. And this place does not have a steel factory. The factory is located at some two hours distance. My heart was captured by this place. So, I live here only.”

“But Ishaan, I do not understand it. Why? You are super rich and your family business spans countries. Then why this steel plant? Is everything all right?”

“Trish, all is not what it seems. We try to live in a virtual reality- trying to please the whole world but slowly we realize that the world is strangling us. Our dreams, our hopes and passions - all die due to suffocation. Not everyone is like you. Always giving without question. I craved for the approval of my father. For him, I joined the family business. But he was not happy. I was not doing enough. There was something missing. I was always running to achieve a goal which only he could see. I even married according to his choice.”

“Married?” I repeat stupidly. That was unexpected.

“Yes, married to an heiress. For me it was life long relation, but it was more of a business transaction for him. In the end it turned out to be a complete mess. We both tried to carry that sham of marriage but failed miserably. It was like we were two pieces of different puzzles that could never be joined. Sometimes I wanted to slip the sickly ties-to escape from every relation I had made. But I knew nothing could help me. I could not call off the marriage as it would besmirch our family name. So I tried. But my every attempt to get closer to her was doomed. I could not utter even a single sentence without being misunderstood. The more I tried, the more she distanced herself. Then one day she rebelled. She killed herself. I was on a tour that time. I left the business that time. I did not want to lose my sanity like her. I wanted to adopt a new life, a new religion and a new work. So, I came here to drown myself in the work. “

“I am sorry, Ishaan. I did not know.”

“I know you did not know. I took every care but I did not have any idea that you will arrive here. But lets leave all this maudlin thoughts. Tell me when you arrived and what are you doing here? It has been ages since I heard my little bird chirp.”

Character Sketch- Day 11 (515 words)

Day Eleven: Let it all hang out.

Focus Word - Chill

Song Prompt - Let It All Hang Out by: the Hombres

(spoken): "A preachment, dear friends, you are about to receive
on John Barleycorn, nicotine, and the temptations of Eve"
(Bronx cheer)

No parkin' by the sewer sign
Hot dog, my razor's broke
Water drippin' up the spout
But I don't care, let it all hang out

Hangin' from a pine tree by my knees
Sun is shinin' through the shade
Nobody knows what it's all about,
It's too much, man, let it all hang out

Saw a man walkin' upside down
My T.V.'s on the blink
Made Galileo look like a Boy Scout
Sorry 'bout that, let it all hang out

Sleep all day, drive all night
Brain my numb, can't stop now
For sure ain't no doubt
Keep an open mind, let it all hang out

It's rainin' inside a big brown moon
How does that mess you baby up, leg
Eatin' a Reuben sandwich with sauerkraut
Don't stop now, baby, let it all hang out

Let it all hang out (harmonized) [repeat to fade]

It is morning again. I do not want to get up. I am afraid if I get up I will realize it was all a dream. I met Ishaan again yesterday, didn’t I? And if I did not get up I will realize it is all reality. Ohh god, no, no, no!! I won’t think about it again. I had spent my night tossing turning in this bed- imagining all kind of scenarios. I won’t be a fool again. I was done with spending my time in thinking of Ishaan- I won’t think about him. With the resolve, I get up to get ready.

“Hmmm, I wonder what should I wear?” I spoke aloud to myself. May be the blue silk dress.  I admire the dress on me. “Off, Trisha, Trisha!!! You are going to work, not to a party. You do not need to dress up for Ishaan. “

I finally get prepared-wearing what I picked up by closing my eyes. (I peeked a bit, but that was to be done. After all, I have to maintain my dressing style.)

I see him. He is waiting at the end of the café. He does not need to turn. I know him by the air heavy with his awareness. He, his profile and his face is still fresh in my memory. But this is not fair.  He is not bald; neither he has any protruding belly. He is still as picturesque as ever. But these past years has matured him. Instead of his charm, there is gravity in him – as if he will be there as a rock support. I frown at my fantasies.

“Good morning, Ishaan”.

“Good morning, Trish. How are you this morning? You foot is fine? “

“Ohh as new as ever. You know a small scrape cannot overcome me. “

“Of course, unbreakable as ever.” Ishaan says pulling out a chair for me. “Have a seat. Unbreakable or no, you need you breakfast.” We are served with toast and tea.

“So, Miss Trisha has finally risen over all the customs and bondages. Tell me Trish, how does it feel to tell them all to hang? You feel freed?” Ishaan continued, gazing at me with its penetrable gaze.

“Ishaan, I was never bound; I was just rooted by my responsibilities. And I would have left them earlier as well, but the reason did not arise. It is not easy, you know. To see the chilling behavior of my acquaintances and face their cold shoulders. But I learned to survive. I learned to ignore them. I guess you are right, I learned to tell them all to hang by their idea of wrong and right. I do not care whether they accept it or not- but I know I was right to call off that engagement. I will stand for what is right. I will not let the circumstances dominate me.” I realize I am shaking with excitement, or with the freedom of truth I do not know.

Ishaan starts clapping for me. “Bravo Trish, bravo. Finally my little bird has learned to fly.”