ज़रा देखो तो सही

ज़रा देखो तो सही मजबूरियों के बोझ तले कुचले हुए सपनों को 

हर पल व्यस्तता के चक्रव्यूह में खोये वादों  को ,

सब किया जिनके लिए, सब चाहा जिनके लिए 

ज़रा देखो तो सही  एक बार उन दूरियों में खोते अपनों को 

माना ख्वाइशों की मंज़िल अभी दूर है, माना चलने को तुम मजबूर हो  

पर दो पल ज़रा थमो तो सही, उन खोये हुए लम्हों की ख़ातिरज़रा देखो तो सही इस जल्दबाजी के साये में खोई खुशियों को

उड़ने दो अरमानों को

उड़ने दो उन अरमानों को, जो कब से हैं उड़ने की ताक में 

थके हुए, हारे हुए कब से हैं वो उस उड़ान की फ़िराक में 

माना ज़िन्दगी के हैं बोझ बहुत, 

माना रास्ते हैं अनजान बहुत,

पर कुछ पल अपने नाम सही

चाहे छोटी ही हो, पर कुछ पल की उड़ान सही 

बहने दो उन कश्तियों को, जो कब स हैं इक सागर की तलाश में 

दरी हुई, खोई हुई , कब से हैं वो लहरों की आस में 

माना है जीवन सागर में तूफ़ान बहुत 

माना मुश्किलों के हैं एहसान बहुत 

पर कुछ पल एहसास सही 

चाहे थोडा ही हो, पर कुछ पल का विश्वास सही.

मैं सोचूँ भी तो क्या सोचूँ

मैं सोचूँ भी तो क्या सोचूँ

मैं सोचूँ भी तो क्या सोचूँ , ज़िन्दगी हर पल  इक नया रूप दिखाती है 

कभी अतीत के ज़ख्मों से लथपथ , कभी आने वाले कल के उजाले में जगमगाती है

मैं सोचूँ भी तो क्या सोचूँ , ज़िन्दगी हर पल  इक नया रूप दिखाती है 

सब पूछते है कि आगे का क्या सोचा है तुमने, 

अपनी कल्पनाओं में आने वाले पल में क्या देखा है तुमने,

कैसे बताएँ सबको कि चलती तो हूँ मैं अरमानों कि ओट में,

पर उन उजड़े हुए सपनों की चीख अब भी दिल को दहला जाती है 

कभी अँधेरे के सितारों कि तरह, कभी बुझते हुए दिये सी नज़र आती है 

मैं सोचूँ भी तो क्या सोचूँ , ज़िन्दगी हर पल  इक नया रूप दिखाती है 

सब पूछते हैं की थक तो नहीं गयी तुम चलते चलते 

कहीं ज़िन्दगी यूँ ही न बीत जाएगी ढलते ढलते 

कैसे बताये सबको कि उम्मीद  तो अब भी नहीं छोड़ी है मैंने,

पर ज़िन्दगी कि लुका छुपी कभी कभी बहुत डराती है 

कभी काँटों की तरह चुभती है , कभी नाज़ुक काली सी मुस्कुराती है 

मैं सोचूँ भी तो क्या सोचूँ , ज़िन्दगी हर पल  इक नया रूप दिखाती है 

Why doesn't my heart learns from its mistake?

One of my older creations....Not very beautiful bt still it is mine!!! :)


Why doesn't my heart learns from its mistakes?
How much more it needs to partake?
It has been hurt, it has been torn,
Its feelings has been completely shorn.
But still it believes what people claim.
How can it be so foolish, so lame?

Even after being let down a thousands times,
It still expects people to share.
Even after being brushed aside for every dime,
It expects them to honestly care.
I don't believe why it still accepts their claim.
How can it be so foolish so lame?

But then I recall what was once ingrained,
Those who have faith can only stand again.
It might  be foolish, it might be lame,
But because of its belief, it will never be ashamed.

An Evening Walk

I picked up my daughter from a daycare. I was tired from the work but satisfied. I had been working on a consulting project for past two months - drowning in the influx and outflux of files. And my hard work had finally paid off. Caught up in the web of project, I had not given sufficient time to my six year old daughter, Rose . Today , I had decided to devote the whole evening to her. But destiny had some other plans for me. Due to some construction work going on, we had to deboard earlier and walk some distance. It was a beautiful, sunny day. But I was still grudging.

I asked Rose, “So, how was your day at school?”

Rose answered haltingly, “ We played a game. Teacher asked all of us what do we want to become when we grow up?”

“So what did you reply? “ I was hoping that she would say architecture, though somewhere I knew she liked being a film star better.

“I told my teacher I wanted be a child when I grow up.”

I was confused. A child? “Not a lawyer, architecture or a film star.” I tried to understand her reasoning.

“No mom. I just want to be a child when I grow up. . .

Because if I become someone else, I would not be able to laugh and stay natural like me. I would have to work day and night. And if I get time on holiday I would have to spend it on either phone or laptop.

There would be no time for my Dolls and Teddy's...

no time for my small Kitchen and Home Set decorations...

no time for my swings at children's park and catching butterfly or birds ...

And I would forget to notice beautiful things also. So, I would like to become a child when I grow up so that I should continue playing with mud in the park and with water in the bathroom. That ways can be grown up and happy as well”, she stubbornly insisted.

I was speechless, I was wondering if I talking to my six years old daughter? What made her so mature? Do I lost my innocent connection with my daughter?And when did me and my husband lost our happiness and laugh? I tried to remember the last time when we had gone for a family walk. I couldn’t remember. Probably, somewhere in the past we had grown old.

Rose’s words and her innocence brought me back to earth, “So, Mom, are you spending the whole day with me? Are we going to park now? What are the plans.”

I lifted my daughter, grabbed her in my arms and kissed her forehead “I guess we are going straight to park for an evening walk…and on coming weekend we shall go for a theme park with daddy!